It all began in Valerie’s womb. There, I was able to paint with vile secretions to express my exploration of life (ha-ha). I have no proof of that but I’d like to believe. Anyhow, As a young chick I was heavily into dance. I was on a competition dance team from a wee age. At times I was a seven year old dancing with eighteen year olds (oh did mom love that.) The baby book will tell you that at a Belinda Carlisle concert I was lifted on stage to be given a kiss, a rose, and a guitar pick. This was all because I was a teeny three year old dancing my heart out to “Heaven on earth.” The older I got the dancing moved more and more to the back burner, with art on high boil. Music I feel brought my whole world together; that was never to fade. I was classically trained in piano and Viola. Though when the dark cloud of adolescence hovered, in an act of rebellion I quit (to this day I regret that.) Beyond being misunderstood by other children, especially when it came to dress, my family was torn apart, wait for it…wait for it…by DIVORCE. All that comes with the cliché drifting of a man and women whom have bore children, truly shook my growing mind at the age of ten. From then on a love affair with the dark was to ensue. Darkness became my “cute, approachable, girl next door.” When grounds were shaky, I ran to her and hid in her arms. She was always present in my dress, in my drawings, in my writing. As people have the “pretending to text, in awkward situations” Growing up, I had a book or a sketchbook, to shove my face in to avoid the outside world. My sixth grade art teacher picked up on this and entered me in my first art contest. From then on I was always given extra and different art projects. I felt like I had no safety zones other than the ones I built in my mind. I ended up graduating a year early from high school because I was in a huge hurry to escape to an art school. There I thought, I would feel welcome and be able to snuggle up in class and conversation. Before I got to College for Creative studies I was heavy into extreme sport. I spent eleven years snowboarding, but my newfound love was rock climbing. I traveled to the Rocky mountains to climb 250 ft rock formations and then spent time with my aunt whom I believe is my biggest influence through art. Hope Kroll is a Collage artist with a deeper sense of the morbid then I. We share the same bitter blood.

Upon entering the art institution I was undeclared. And if it were up to my paws, I wouldn’t have declared anything anyhow. Needless, to say I was in a pickle and chose crafts. The ultimate goal was to learn how to create worlds others could enter besides my brain and I. It was a toss up between crafts and animation; I chose the former. The burning molten evil liquid when cooled called “glass” became one of my lovers. The seduction of the sexy liquid that you couldn’t touch was very intriguing to me. I was the cat and the glass was the mouse but the mouse always had ways of fending me off, seemingly the temperature. After graduation I continued in praising glass at the studio Michigan Hot Glass in Russell Industrial Center (pre-people invasion.) At that time there were only a few studios and it was a pleasure to run around the ruins and spook myself out. Around that time I was interning at Cpop where I met my mentor and best friend Rick Manore. I like to say he gave me a masters in art history. It was a goal of mine to show at Cpop gallery and eventually I did just so. Slowly, Glass slipped through my tiny hands and I traded it for a guitar, keyboard, and a DIY recording studio at home. Honestly, Social phobia was holding my hand o so tight and I had to resort to an art form I could work on at my home. I performed my whole first album under the name “Minnie Krueger Buys The Farm” at the music hall (opening for Afrika bambaattaa.) This was a huge accomplishment because I had only starting writing, recording, and playing only about 4 months before.

Working through my fears, I was on board a summer in Ann Arbor with the title of “head of wardrobe” on the feature film “Art House”, starring Iggy Pop and Gretta Gerwig. The movie also contained my one and only pop song.

Having grown up in Michigan, the interest in living somewhere other than the mitten has warmed my body for sometime. I took to the next big city to the left of our state and tried, TRIED to start fresh in Chicago. Finding a surrounding of creatives was almost impossible for me. I was out of the loop while living right in the middle of The Loop. Turning inward and shying away from everyone and everything, I truly fell far into the rabbit hole of my mind. No access to any studios or even friends forced me to find another way to create at home. Living in an apt didn’t allow for me to be loud with music and release sound that way. I dug up an old eight color, semi-moist watercolor set. I still have it; I devour the black, blue, and red. Moreover, I started with animals and much to my surprise I had conjured up some style of awesome amounts of color being puked all over the object, while being safely contained in a stark white page. The irony is I was utterly miserable and lost and painting with more colors than rainbow bright could handle. Not to mention, “Is that all there is” by Peggy Lee was on repeat for about a year. May of 2009, I was able to escape this country and spend two weeks in the mind-blowing land called Tokyo. Having about a year of Japanese in my pocket I explored and permeated the bright city. Of course I left with new goals and a new outlook. Upon returning home, I began shape shifting. Expressing myself through the different animals I was transforming into was the next grouping of paintings. Around this time, in a nutshell, fate or life or whatever brought me out of my messy Chicago existence and back to Detroit. I immediately received a short six week stint as a puppet making teacher in an outsource program from Matrix theater. I also, began working at 323 East selling art and creative related goodies. In the former gallery I was involved in two group shows.

Now we are up to date. Diving deep into the emotion ocean, I am tearing off my skin to distribute to whomever will be attending my first solo show “Show pony.” A sickly deep exploration of my mental state, my abilities, and the public’s subjective view is Show pony. I question myself as to why I have to thrust myself into the public’s eye to overcome different fears. Could be fear of ennui, but most would cure that with a movie. I feel like I am diving into a pool of sharks…and I kind of like it.

Comment from Dan - March 7, 2014 at 11:05 pm

Jac, Bet you’re glad we met yesterday in the warmth of the day. Hope to give you a forge demo next time. Dan